I recently found the hard drive of all my first posts, writing in a Yahoo Group called Marina's Kitchen Table. It was the same thing as here, but perhaps a little more devotional in writing, as I leaned hard on God during a really difficult season in life.
I'm sharing those first writings again, as we make another move, and I anticipate my time at the computer to be more focused on getting the work done on that handbook on Missionary Care.
I hope that you enjoy these entries as much as I do. I have NO idea where this journey will go, as I was as irregular a writer then as I am now! :) Some things never change!
"There is so much more we would like to say about
this. But you don't seem to listen, so it's hard to make you understand. You have been Christians a long time now, and you ought to be teaching others. Instead, you need someone to teach you again the basic things a beginner must learn about the Scriptures. You are like babies who drink only milk and cannot eat solid food. And a person who is living on milk isn't very far along in the Christian life and doesn't know much about doing what is right. Solid food is for those who are
mature, who have trained themselves to recognize the difference between right and wrong, and then do what is right! So let us stop going over the basics of Christianity again and again. Let us go on instead and become mature in our understanding. Surely we don't need to start all over again with the importance of turning away from evil deeds and placing our faith in God. You don't need further instruction about baptisms, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment. And so, God willing, we will move forward to further understanding." Hebrews 5:11-6:3
OK...I give up! I surrender!
God has been teaching me an important lesson lately, and I confess, it's been a difficult one for me to get through. I am an expert at making excuses, especially when I'm trying to sidestep responsibilities.
Lately we have been praying about several family issues, no catastrophe's (praise be to God), but things that need prayer before changing. In the course of praying, in my little mind (with tiny amounts of faith), I keep coming to this part of the prayer that says, "But what about ME, God?"
Now that in itself should send up a red flag, as I should not need to ask about my needs! In retrospect, I see myself as the selfish kid, with a whole room full of wonderful games and entertainment opportunities, sitting on the floor with a long face and a "there's nothing to do" attitude.
God has given me the desire to write. It's been a gift that He ordained. I even wrote before I gave my life to Him, of course, not for His glory, but I used the gift anyways. Now He has given me the desire to write. He has given me the ability to write (I realize that you may not agree with that statement!). And (oddly enough) when I use my time wisely, He has given me the time and means to write. SO WHY DON'T I WRITE???!!!
What He has been teaching me is this...He has COMMANDED me to write. Out of obedience to His will, I NEED to do this!! When I don't do this I am being disobedient. Disobedience is SIN. Period.
He has not called me to write things to be pleasing to all people. I am not called to be concerned WHO reads this (and who deletes it!). It shouldn't matter at all, as He has only required me to write!! If I do something that is wrong for me, even if it's not spelled out in the Bible, it's sin in my life. In this case, I am not doing something that He wants me to do, and the effect is the same...I am sinning! Don't ask me why it took me so long to grasp that concept, but it did!
So, out of obedience to Him, seeking His will for my life, I will write. I will try to share my heart in an open and honest way, always hoping to encourage you to grow closer to Him. Although I pray that it will bless others, I pray that it will NOT be MY writing, but rather HIS Holy Spirit moving through these entries, that blesses you. I ask that you will accept my apology for my lack of obedience, as I confess this sin to you!! I hope that you may learn from MY mistake, and will find what gift you have that you should be using.
Blessings in Christ,